Life in Cincinnati
You know you live (or have lived) in Cincinnati if ...
You know the first pro baseball team ever was the
Cincinnati Red Stockings (1869).
You remember watching Bob Shreve's "All Night Theater."
You call it "pop" not soda or a soft drink.
You or your kids played "Knot Hole" ball not "Little
You know that "Millcreek" would not be a good name for
One of your favorite candies is a French Chew.
You remember that Ruth Lyons put flowers around her
You know that Norwood, Ohio is the only city that is
completely surrounded by another city.
You could take a picnic basket to Coney Island leave it on
a table and it was still there at lunch time.
You asked for a beer and it was brewed in Cincinnati.
Before Walmart there were Rink's, Ontario's, Zayre's, and
You know "Paul Baby's" last name was Dixon.
You watched "Hattie the Witch" featuring Larry Smith and
his Puppets every afternoon.
You remember Bob Shreve was on Channel 9 for the afternoon
You remember the "Wild Mouse" at Coney Island.
For you more mature folks ... You cruised up the Ohio River
on the Island Queen to Coney Island and danced in Moonlight Gardens and
swam in Sunlight Pool.
Christmas wasn't complete until you went downtown to the
CG&E building and saw the model trains.
You were told by older relatives that Cincinnati was the
first in the country to have a full time paid Fire Department back in
We don't say, Y'all, we say "you guys" and that includes
the women too and some say "yous guys".
You know that Kahn's is "the wiener the world awaited".
You know who said "This is the old left-hander rounding
third and headed for home" on the Reds broadcasts (Joe Nuxhall still the
youngest MLB player at age 15).
And you know who said "and this one belongs to the Reds"
You remember that the Reds played at Crosley Field and then
You remember the "Streitman Biscuit Company" before it
You remember "Midwestern Hayride" and know who Kenny Price
You shopped "downtown" at Shillitos, Pogues and McAlpins
and for special things at Mabley and Carew.
You know who the Cool Ghoul was and what channel he was on
(WXIX Channel 19).
You knew who Bob Braun was before he sold furniture on late night TV.
You can sing the "Audience Wave" jingle from the 50-50
You immediately recognize the name "Brent Spence" but don't
know who he was (long time Democratic Congress man from Newport,
You recognize the name "Ezzard Charles" but don't really
know who he was (Cincinnati's only Heavyweight Boxing Champion).
You know that pigs do fly in Cincinnati, as can be seen by the four majestic winged pigs on the river front.
You know that the Cincinnati Airport is not even in Ohio
and that the letters CVG stand for Covington, Kentucky.
You know that "Reading Road" is pronounce "REDing Road ...
not READing Road".
You know what bread is "Hearth-baked on Stone" (Rubels' Rye Bread).
You remember when the first "Gold Star Chili" parlor was named "Hamburger Heaven" and was in Mt. Washington just across from the old movie
You know who said (and you were very annoyed by), "I don't care
about making money .... I just looooovvve to sell carpet!".
You spend every weekend in October going to a different
You remember when the Bengals last went to the Superbowl and gas was $1.09 a gallon.
You have friends and neighbors with names like Gukenberger,
Hirlinger, Schottlekotte, Schraffenberger and Schoenling.
You know who Al Schottelkotte was.
You know exactly when each parish has its festival and which
ones are the best.
You think that the only "tri-state" area in the US is Ohio, Kentucky and Indiana (some say that is how Okeana got it's name ... but those who live
there know it was named after a local Native American
During a taste test you can tell the difference in the following chili's: Skyline, Cincinnati Recipe, Empress, Gold Star, Camp Washington (pronounced
Camp WARSHington), Worthmore, and Dixie.
And you know that chili is served in Chili Parlors, not
You know how to spell Cincinnati and it is not: Cincinti,
Cincinatti, Cincinnatti, Cinnanatti.
And you know it is pronounced "sin-sin-nat-tee" not "sin-sin-nat-ta."
You "warsh" your clothes.
You go to "Cook-outs" not BBQ's.
You wear "gym shoes" not sneakers or tennis shoes.
Anytime anyone wants to know where you graduated from, you answer without hesitation, your high school ... no one cares where you went to
One of the best summer treats, a Black Cow using Barq's Root
Beer or a Red Cow using Barq's Cream Soda.
You know how to "Save Cash With Kash".
You know the "Cross Town Shootout" is not a wild west gun fight but the most important college basketball game during the season, between XU and UC.
You take a leisurely summer drive through a suburban
neighborhood and you see a cornhole game on every block.
You know the Daniel Carter Beard bridge is called the Big Mac
You know it is not Easter without Papas Cream Eggs.
Instead of saying "what?" you say "please?"
You add an "s" to the end of grocery store names, such as
Kroger(s) and Meijer(s.)
You drive on roads that change names at the county line, such as Loveland-Madeira, Fields-Ertel, Hamilton-Mason and Cincinnati-Dayton.
You can buy beer by driving through a drive thru pole barn or
at the "Pony Keg."
You believe that LaRosa's is fine Italian dining and have a
You recognize Anthony Munoz as a former NFL player not a
You remind people that Pompillos was in the movie Rainman.
You understand the traffic reports which ignore road names and use locations such as: "Cut in the hill", "Lockland Split", "Five Mile", "Wards Corner", "Kenwood Cut", and "The "S" curve".
Your local convenient store sounds like a labor union: United
You believe that Pete Rose should be in the hall of fame.
You miss Marge Schott and Schottzie.
You know that everyone has an "Uncle Al".
Your favorite "Coney Island" isn't in New York.
You know what brats and metts are.
You know that the only kind of goetta to eat is Gliers!
You know who Skipper Ryle was.
You are at a Bob Evans Restaurant and don't think it is strange
to see someone put ketchup on their eggs.
You like Nick Clooney better than George Clooney.
You know how Jerry Springer got his start (and that you
shouldn't write a check to a prostitute).
You think a mixed marriage is where an East-Sider marries a
You know the difference between Hudy and Who-dey.
You know what "cream ale" is and you think that all cream soda should be bright red.
You can visit Lebanon, California, Moscow, Wyoming, and go
"Over the Rhine" all in the same day.
You know what is at "Where Paddock meets Vine at the Big Indian Sign" - at least if you've ever been to the east side.